I am a type A.

I like control.

We put up our Christmas decorations on Saturday and I learned (again) how selfish I am.  Having 5 little helpers with all of their own ideas where things should go, was a challenge, plus add a very mobile Jack.  Lights must look like candy to him.  I love decorating for Christmas, usually at night once everyone was asleep.  Playing music softly in the background with the light turned way down low with a cup of hot chocolate is my idea of a great night.  This year was a whole different ball game.

We pulled out all the boxes, mistake number 1.  What do small children like to do with boxes?  Open them and take everything out!  This was happening while I was changing a couple of strands of lights on the tree that were no longer working.  As I am stringing lights, Silas, Titus and Adie were adding ornaments to the bottom of the tree- three to four on each branch.

Christmas music was blaring in the background, I was kind of crabby working on the lights, blah blah blah.  I took a little timeout to remind myself the purpose of it all.  Why do I decorate the house?  for my joy or my children’s joy? Is is about being perfect or being real? Will my tree get knocked over this year? Probably.  So, does it matter if it is leaning a little right now? No.  Does is matter if the three wise men have front row while Joseph is somewhere is the back of the manger scene? No.  Can the Santa hats be worn outside to public events? Yes, their heads are covered. Do I need to worry over any of these details.  Nope.

None of it matters if I don’t point them to Jesus.  He is the ultimate source of joy, not my temporary happiness on whether my house looks “nice” or not.

I am learning to let go.